I'm sick of those stupid birds thinking they own the sky, letting their poop fall where it may. Perhaps it's time for us land-walkers to have our revenge against the birds!
Birds are nice and all but as I was walking one fateful sunny afternoon, they attacked me... with a barrage of flying shit! It was a massacre...
Nothing landed on me though. :D
On a side note, as I was walking past the small field surrounding a bridge with a train overhead, I heard an awkward silence. Yep; that's right: crickets. It wasn't just one little leg-rub though. It sounded like they were having rampant cricket sex and I was all like, "Holy crap! Did that train dump a load of Viagra out of a car or something?" :T
Well anyway, we're human; we're smart. We don't need our modern guns to take down such a tiny adversary; we can just use blunderbusses full of shit. Let's see how they like getting shat on!
Or, even better: we can take out large flocks of them using shit catapults. It's not like we'll ever run out of shit. ;D
Of course, we'll all have to sleep with one eye open because the birds can strike back at any time. I mean, they've already gone to biological warfare with their H5N1 bird flu.
They haven't even played their final trump yet. Let's just pray that they don't resort to using their most powerful and dangerous weap-OH SHIT IT'S HARVEY BIRDMAN!
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